Celeb Apprentice Recap: Entertainment(dot)WHAT?

Celeb Apprentice Recap: Entertainment(dot)WHAT?

Bitches! Whores! Brawling! This episode opens with potty language and fireworks and I like it. Arsenio hates Aubrey, Lisa hates Arensio and Lou and Dayana simply Will. Not. Be. Fired.

The task starts with Trump telling people “Smart people use Entertainment.com to save money” which is hilarious because I seriously doubt Donald Trump cares about saving money, has ever visited Entertainment.anything or even knows what the internet is. The teams are tasked to create commercials enticing people to use this coupon-based money saving website.

After her fight with Arsenio Aubrey threatened to leave, but she returns to take a stand against the “bullies” on her team. She goes to Arsenio Hall and offers a (fake) olive branch and he decides to apologize because of AIDS or HIV or whatever. They kiss and make up but obviously still do not like each other. Frenemies are fun to watch on TV.

Teresa reluctantly decides to be project manager of her volatile team. On the flip side, dumb Dayana volunteers to be PM of her team, which frightens and upsets Lisa Lampanelli. Every time I hear Dayana speak I wonder how she even breathes air let alone has survived this long on the show. Trump must REALLY want to bang her.

Dayana’s team comes up with a “love story” theme to show the vast benefits your life might receive from using coupons from Entertainment.com. Lou bitches that he doesn’t get to play the main actor which is his usual complaint. He knows he’s useless, but that’s the only way

he can imagine himself actively participating in the team. He does make helpful suggestions about trying different camera angles, which dumb Dayana ignores. Because she is dumb.

Teresa’s team comes up with a racy commercial about a father mistaking his daughter’s computer use for an orgy. Paul plays the dad and it’s cute to see him dressed up exactly like Wilford Brimley. Somebody say “Diabeetus!”

Penn leaves to do a show and his team is pissed, but they bullshit Donald Junior and say they are okay without him. At least Junior knows Dayana isn’t capable of independent thought or winning on her own, and realizes Penn and Lisa Probably did all the work. Lisa starts warming up to Dayana and I don’t like it. Come on girl, WE ARE SUPPOSED TO HATE DAYANA. Lou fumbles around trying to make banners or do anything useful and the editors play music that makes him look literally retarded. Poor Lou. Poor Poor Lou.

Aubrey, as usual kicks ass. Her team hates on her, makes fun of her and Aubrey is kind of detestable in a way, but she’s just so smart and good at everything that I have to like her. Haters gonna hate so play on Aubrey O’ Day. I think I like her because she is annoying and always right. Just like me.

In the end Lou is fired and everyone in America is like OMFG FINALLY. Clearly Lou doesn’t understand that he’s actually fired or what that means, so he’ll probably show up for task next week.

Next week: Puppets!



  • Chandlerpcat

    There should be a dislike button !!!