The reality TV gods continued to bless us this week with two more amazing train-wreck episodes of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.
This week we got to see the family doing some extreme couponing and getting pedicures. I think you can guess which incident was more tragic. But anyway, just like last week, I’m going to break down the recap into the top moments and quotes because there’s no way this show can ever be reviewed traditionally.
Top 5 Moments
1. Mama’s extreme coupon trip to the Piggly Wiggly. The part of this excursion that stands out the most is the reference to rust remover and how it could be used to help remove “mama’s neck crust (or rust — who can tell what anyone is saying).” Curious? So was I. Then the camera zoomed in for a nice up-close shot of gunk trapped between Mama’s neck roles. I’m really glad I wasn’t still eating dinner.
2. The subtitles. TLC has included subtitles with pretty much everyone who speaks on this show. And I’m thankful for that because sometimes I think I hear them say something ridiculous and I’m all no way! But then the subtitles spell it out for me and they’ve actually said something even more ridiculous than I thought.
3. Glitzy poops on the kitchen table. I know with names like Pumpkin and Chubbs, you probably think Glitzy is Honey Boo Boo’s baby sister, but no. It’s her baby pig. And yes, it was on the kitchen table. Where it pooped. There’s nothing else I can say about that.
4. The pedicures. The ladies of the family decided to have a spa date and I’m pretty sure the employees have all changed careers since then. There was so much feet “crust” that I nearly turned the TV off and switched careers myself. Luckily, Mama decided not to have her feet done because she has “tow truck toes.” Apparently she had her foot run over when she as younger and now has a deformed toe and won’t ever take her socks off.
5. Mama and Sugar Bear’s Date. It’s Honey Boo Boo’s parents’ common-law marriage anniversary and they’ve never been out on a date before. They head off to a buffet dinner and feed each other dessert and even have a kiss. Then Sugar Bear gives Mama a deer statue, which she rejects. Poor Sugar Bear. He still plans to “get some” a little later. BRB. Gotta vom.
“Every time I go in the store they probably think I have a bowel movement problem.” — Mama on her huge supply of toilet paper
“It’s even better than sex.” — Mama on couponing
“I hope Mama don’t eat Glitzy. She eats everything else.” — Honey Boo Boo on her baby pig Glitzy
“All that boy is wanting is to get in your little biscuit and get a little piece then he’s running.” — Mama on her pregnant teen daughter’s baby daddy
“Please tell me you got a cheese grater out for their feet.” — Mama to the manicurist
“It wasn’t love at first sight. It was bed at first sight. You’ve got to try the milk before you buy the cow.” — Mama on when she first met Sugar Bear