This week on Push Girls, Mia and Angela go on dates while Tiphany reconnects with an old flame (or fling, we come to learn). Auti doesn’t go on a date (she’s married), but still participates in the “Girls Night Out” at an opening of an art gallery. Chelsie makes a quick cameo with Tiphany in a nail salon, but as quickly as she appears she disappears and I’m still left wondering what happened with her and Josh after the kiss two episodes ago. What the heck Sundance? Tell me what happen to Chelsie and Josh! Did you forget about that cliffhanger? And has anyone else (besides me) grown tired of hearing the word wheelchair? I tried counting the number of times it was said during this episode and lost count at 30+ times, which is a big number for a show that runs roughly for 24 minutes. In fact, it means the word “wheelchair” is said every minute the show is aired, and sometimes more than once each minute. Gag me. It’s too much.
Anyhoo, the dating episode begins with Tiphany perusing her online dating profile. Upon finding her in front of the computer stalking local men, Angela asks Tiphany if she shares her wheelchair use on her online dating profile. Tiphany says no, but it’s not for reasons you might think. She’s not trying to hide her disability; she just doesn’t want to share this information with strangers for safety reasons, which is clearly the smartest thing (perhaps even the only smart thing) Tiphany has said all season. But do not fear…
In seconds, whacked-out Tiphany is back. In a camera interview, she admits to making poor dating decisions (which is something we can all relate to). But then she takes it a step further by telling the story of being thrown out of her chair by an abusive partner, falling hard enough to receive a concussion. WHAT. Who does that to a woman? Never mind a woman in a wheelchair? Perhaps this is the real reason she dabbles in the lesbian pool earlier this season? Or perhaps she really is that terrible at picking partners? Because when she shows Angela the profile of a possible dating candidate, a full-sleeved tattooed guy with half-dollar sized gages in his ears, Angela cringes in disgust (which totally becomes ironic later when we get to see her date, Cody, a young alternative boy who is twelve years her junior).
Cut to the four girls arriving at an art gallery party and wouldn’t you know? There’s a step to get up into the show. Auti asks some strong men to pick each of them up, and the hiccup is easily solved (see, ladies, asking for help isn’t so terrible). Once inside the gallery, Angela points out the obvious—everyone is staring at them. Like I have mentioned before, this is one of the reasons many wheelchair users don’t hang out together. Watching four wheelchairs maneuver in one room or space is like watching a small traveling circus. But let’s be real—these women like love the attention. Cue Tiphany interview: “I have no problem getting attention when I roll into a room,” she says. “I think guys are thinking, ‘Hmmm… could I date a girl in a wheelchair?” But who’s to say? The guys could also be thinking, “Hmmm… I hope that bitch doesn’t run over my new leather shoe” or “What a nightmare! Look at all those wheelchairs.” But who’s to say?
Cut to a scene outside the art gallery and in front of a food truck. A guy walks by the girls and tells one of the girls she’s beautiful (it’s hard to know which one). Most women would appreciate a compliment like this, especially after dressing up for a night out on the town. Yet, these bitter old bats have found a way to make the compliment sound insulting. “Guys tell us we’re the most beautiful, like we’ve never gotten a compliment before,” Tiphany explains, acting annoyed. Say what? I can promise you Tiphany, a man is not that thoughtful. He probably said what came to mind because he’s a man. I highly doubt he took the extra 30 seconds to think, “Aw, look at the poor girl in a wheelchair. Let me walk over there and tell her how pretty she. I’m sure no one else has done this before.” After all, he is a man. Men work on instincts, not thoughtfulness. Yet even if a man told me I was beautiful every single day (which I’m lucky enough to have one that does), I still could hear more of it. I enjoy receiving compliments. I especially enjoy being told I’m beautiful. So let’s calm down on the over-analyzing Tiphany. Not everything happens just because you’re in a wheelchair.
And the dating frenzy begins!
Date 1 — Angela goes to lunch with Cody, a guy she met at a party. “I leaned down to talk to her and before I knew it we just kissed,” the 24-year-old tells the camera (and by the way Angela is 38). But at the lunch table, the mood is not as romantic because Angela can’t stop asking questions. “Did you plan on kissing me?” “You said you didn’t see my wheelchair, how could you not see my wheelchair?” “You’re a freak! Are you a freak?” “The age difference doesn’t bother you?” And then the already awkward date gets weirder. She finally laughs (so maybe she was teasing him during the question brigade?), and he let’s us in on some other news via a camera interview, “The first time laying in bed with Angela, I wasn’t thinking of her paralysis. I was just feeling her body and asking, Can you feel this?’” UM, WHAT?!? Where was this footage? And what a little slut you are Angela… kudos!
Date 2 — Mia agrees to go kayaking with Edahn, who is a guy she met at a Jewish Single’s Party. Let me repeat, Edahn asked her to go kayaking! How cool is it that? It’s something he’s never done, and an event he set up because he remembered she liked sports. I think that takes some balls, especially since he’s not a sporty guy. “My Jewish genes don’t lend themselves to adrenaline sports,” he admits. Plus 10 points for Edwan. At the kayaking place, Mia puts her vanity aside for the chance of love and forces a tight neoprene wet suit upon her skinny fragile body. The two of them go through a quick round of instruction and then they’re off to the boat. Mia struggles to transfer into the kayak, even though both the instructor and her date offer her help. Minus 10 point for Mia. Men love helping women, and sometimes you just have to pretend helpless (even able-bodied women do this). But once inside the boat, the two take off and again Mia is on an adorable date with what seems like a good guy. They paddle together all over the place, seeing seals and larger sailing boats, and then Mia asks, “If you had a boat, what would you name it?” “Lady,” Edahn says. “I don’t think ‘Lady’ is creative enough,” Mia retorts, minus-ing herself 10 more points. Stop being so mean, Mia. Geez.
After a long day of kayaking, Edahn arranged a picnic on the beach (Plus 10 more points). And for the first time Mia acts like a lady and asks Edahn to pick her up and place her on the blanket. Edahn, the gentleman that he is, quickly scoops her up and tells her, “This is the best part of you being in a wheelchair.” And it’s official. Edahn is perfect (Plus 10,000 points). But Mia doesn’t feel a spark and she’s hell bent on not settling, which becomes kind of sad. She’s now dumped two dudes (three if you count the ex) after having fun on a date, blaming that lack of spark. (Psst. Mia. You can’t feel a lot of things remember? Just sayin’.)
And finally, Date 3 — Tiphany invited Mike, a guy she dated a while back (aka the cheating-bastard!), over to her house to “talk,” which could have been a code word for sex but in this case it really does mean talk. Tiphany wants answers to why Mike cheated on her. Sensing trouble it seems, Mike arrives with his son, Hayden, who appears to have been brought as a distraction to ease tension. Except Hayden makes the awkwardness of the situation worse when he won’t even acknowledge Tiphany, and then denies her a hug when she asks (Those darn kids!).
Eventually, Tiphany confronts Mike for cheating on her and explains to him she hasn’t dated anyone else in three years, since the time it appears they last were together. (Excuse me Tiphany? Um, what about Miyoko? The nice woman that tried to date you in earlier episodes? Oh, that was act, right.) When Mike offers no sympathy, she asks him why he slept with her when he knew she wanted more than just sex. He corrects her. “I told you I wanted a fling,” he basically says. Tiphany calls him a liar, and kicks him to the curb and I’m left wondering, What the hell was the purpose of that scene? Just like when Dustin Nguyen came from Vietnam to visit Angela, Mike’s visit seems to serve no real purpose… which leaves me thinking that maybe these women had interesting lives at one time, but it’s clearly not right now. So I say let’s bring back Chelsie already! Who’s with me?
Up next week: Auti goes into the recording studio. And I can’t wait (to tear that a part)!