A bizarre series of events unfolded on Monday’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. making for a several WTF moments.
For one, Lisa Vanderpump’s old house — the palace across the street from Adrienne Maloof — went up in flames while cameras were filming at Adrienne’s house. I mean, this thing was ON FIRE, with flames shooting out the top. Bye, bye beautiful walk-in closet that’s bigger than my whole house.
Kim Richards also spoke to several of the ‘wives about her concern for Taylor Armstrong, whom she thinks has a serious drinking problem. After all, she pointed out, takes one to know one! And honestly, we couldn’t help but wonder about either women’s sanity, which we’ll explain below.
Here’s what went down:
Kim’s Nose Party
Kim threw a big reveal party for her new nose at her new house, and her schnoz was met with rave reviews. Adrienne mentioned about 25 times how her husband would have built just as beautiful a beak if she had gone to him, but that Kim’s surgeon was lovely also.
Most of the ladies attended Kim’s coming out party, except for Taylor, who was a no-show because she was taking a last-minute weekender with “an old friend who she was in love with.” The women had no idea she’d even been seeing anyone and thought the whole thing was bizarre, and also, that she sounded drunk when she called to tell them.
But more astonishing than this getaway with a mystery man, was the fact that Taylor had NO IDEA that her daughter Kennedy was at the party with Kyle. Doesn’t it just seem like last year she was spending $75K on a 6th birthday party, and now she doesn’t even know where her daughter is? And she’s just gonna take off out of town? What a lovely mother.
Lisa made a point to tell Adrienne that she left spray tan skid marks on her furniture not once, but twice. She had to have professional cleaners come in and treat her white sofa last year, and now her chairs are stained after last week’s tea party.
Adrienne’s like, No biggie, It’s just spray tan! It happens all the time! You can just clean if off with baby wipes.
It finally just dawned on me why a lot of old people encase their furniture in that uncomfortable plastic. Ain’t nobody got time for that.
Kyle’s White Party
Kyle’s annual white white party turned into its usual fustercluck after Brandi decided she wanted to try and clear the air with Adrienne. Brandi, however, was too “anxious” to go up to her when Paul was there, and just wanted to speak to her alone. So, she sent a stranger over to retrieve Adrienne… who naturally brought Paul with her.
The trio had another volley of We’re NOT suing you!/Then how come I had to spend $10,000 on a lawyer? But it was actually elsewhere in the party that a small storm was brewing. Taylor was angry because she got booted out of Kyle’s white party last year after her late husband threatened to sue Camille Grammer. Everyone thought the Armstrongs were total scum at that point. “Friends don’t sue friends,” they said, in a tirade that was mostly led by none other than Adrienne.
So Taylor thought it was only fair that the Maloofs were asked to leave this year’s soiree. But Kyle — who was happy to be involved in the skirmish all season — said she didn’t want to get involved.
Pretty soon, nearly the entire cast was gathered around the “private” discussion between Brandi and the Maloofs, and everyone was adding their .02. Ken Vanderpump stuck up for Brandi and yelled at Paul, saying that Adrienne had said untoward things about his wife last year, but they didn’t threaten to sue. They just put on their British big girl panties and moved away.
Everyone wanted the Maloofs to admit they did the exact same thing to Brandi that they insisted was terribly wrong last season. They refused, saying it wasn’t anywhere near the same. Kyle came over briefly to say, “I don’t want anyone to feel like they’re being attacked in my home.” So everyone proceeded to yell at each other at length before the scene dispersed without an iota of resolution.
No word on whether Adrienne stained any of the white furnishings during her emphatic denial of being a bad friend.
Do you think Adrienne did the same thing to Brandi that the Armstrongs did to Camille last year? Do you have any tips on how to get spray tan out of furniture?
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