The good news: The Real Housewives of New Jersey gang finally made it back from their million-episode California vacation. The bad news: Things were relatively tame this week in comparison to when they are all trapped in moving vehicles together for long periods of time.
But as always, there were some high points in the episode as the housewives and their families got back to the regular daily grind. The main news, though, was that Dino Manzo was back on the scene — and she wasn’t there to support sister Caroline Manzo in her feud with Teresa Giudice.
Here are the best five things from last night’s show:
1. School daze
It was the first day of school for the Gorga and Giudice littles, and when Teresa announced that her daughters only had 45 minutes between being in bed to walking out the door, I was nervous for them. After all, by the time Teresa got them outfitted in all manner of over-the-top leopard prints and tutus, it was going to be the second day of school. Teresa isn’t exactly known for her punctuality.
But when all was said and done, it was Melissa who had to give her daughter a ride to school because after all the breakfast and picture-taking folderol, she missed the bus.
Side note: Milania Giudice was headed to kindergarten. I’m willing to bet that a certain teacher probably checked into a mental facility soon after the year began.
2. Teresa: Stripped down
Every time we see Teresa in minimal makeup, we are stunned by how lovely she is. We kinda wish she’d ditch about 70 percent of her daily makeup routine. But then, that wouldn’t be very Jersey, would it?
3. College tour
Kathy and Richie took their daughter, Victoria, 17, to tour University of Maryland. With student tour guides, they strolled the college campus; Kathy asked ten million questions and Richie added the comic relief. But the best scene by far was when they all packed into a college dorm room and were stunned/horrified/flabbergasted at the modest accommodations. Not sure what they were expecting, but their sheer horror at the cinder block walls, miniature closet and scrunched living space was kind of funny to watch. Joe Giudice probably would have felt much more comfy in a tiny, cinder block room. Just sayin’.
4. Caroline’s dead Sirius
So, apparently Sirius radio was so impressed with Caroline’s radio show, they decided to give her a shot on their national station. She showed up for a test run with her entire family in tow (????). Because really, who doesn’t bring four other people to a job interview? Anyway, when she got on the air and asked for people to call in with questions… and, *crickets*. It was embarrassing and totally awkward. When a few calls did start trickling in, they all wanted to know the Housewives gossip: What’s up with you and Dina? What was the worst fight during your camping trip?
Guess the only people who want Mama Bear’s wisdom and life advice reside in New Jersey.
5. Fabellini fiesta
Teresa finally launched her signature drink, the Febellini, with a big party to which she invited family and close friends. Not surprisingly, no other cast members appeared to be present. Teresa admitted she didn’t invite Jacqueline, even though they supposedly made up on the Napa trip. “With Jacqueline, I decided not to invite her because she hurted me.” Her third grade teacher’s ears probably hurted a bit, too, if she was tuning in.
But the big news was who WAS on the guest list: Ex-RHONJ and Caroline’s sister, Dina. (Sadly, her cat Grandma Wrinkles was nowhere to be found.) Teresa told Dina about the Napa blowout between her and Caroline, and then the two spent time poking fun at the New Jersey matriarch. Yikes. I bet Caroline really blew her carrot top when she saw that footage.
Lastly, was anyone else horrified by that gruesome cartoonish picture of Teresa that was on the Fabellini bottles? Whoever approved that should be fired. It hurted my eyes.
Was Dina’s appearance everything you’d hoped for based on the previews? Is Teresa wrong to involve Dina in her fight with Caroline?