Over the last five weeks, I’ve gone from regarding The Choice as a deadly dull waste of time to finding it at least occasionally diverting, now that it seems to have found its footing as a comedy rather than as a serious dating show. The ratings, while still nothing special, have been going up; and I now suspect that it will come back in some form in the summer of 2013.
We were back to bachelors in the chairs this week: Olympic tae kwon do champion Steven Lopez, actor-comedian Finesse Mitchell, reality fixture Rob Kardashian, and New England Patriots party boy Rob Gronkowski (who went by “Gronk” so as to distinguish him from the other Rob). The Choice has been getting goofier as the weeks have gone on, and this week continued that trend.
Some of the credit goes to Gronkowski, who clearly thirsts to be famous outside of football, and seems to want to present a playboy image (it’s inevitable he will be dating someone from Playboy one day). But the big star was Mitchell, who has kept a mighty low profile since the end of his tenure on Saturday Night Live. The oldest of the bachelors, he was obviously there to joke around about his difficulty catching the eyes of the young women, and drop other one-liners as the need arose. To one woman who talked about having 45 first cousins, he cracked, “That’s a lot of people to be after you if something goes wrong.” And taking a page out of Pauly D’s book, he tried to turn his chair back around when a prospective date revealed she was a virgin.
Highlights of the evening:
We can see his point: Rob K. ended up turning down an Anglo-Persian woman in the end because she reminded him too much of family.
Worst strategy: The only woman who got no takers at all was Princess, who came onstage carrying a Paris Hilton-style Chihuahua – and then told the guys she was carrying a Paris Hilton-style Chihuahua. Add on an affected “dumb blonde” voice, and it’s no mystery why none of the men spun their chairs – though Finesse tried to change his mind when he got a rear view of her as she walked away.
Second-worst strategy: One of Gronk’s picks, Brittany, immediately told him to be quiet during the “speed choice” round, and then got upset when he said he preferred to play the field, as if they were already a couple. She was so obnoxious that Steven even reminded him she was the woman he needed to cut first.
Knowing your audience: Kelly told Rob her favorite movie was Dumb and Dumber.
Keep an eye on: Most of the women on The Choice haven’t seen the need to present themselves as anything more than sex kittens, but Steven’s eventual pick, Angelica (the virgin mentioned above) came across as a great all-around catch, someone he might have wanted to go on a date with apart from the show. “I have high hopes for that one,” host Cat Deeley said as they left the stage.
Update on last week: Three of last week’s female selecters got along with their dates, more or less, but it sounds like something went terribly wrong with the cooking demo that ex-Playmate Hope Dworaczyk attended with the man she chose, Brant. He ended up asking the cooking instructor for her phone number. You mean to seriously tell me that Playboy models aren’t necessarily fun to be with? I’m stunned and disillusioned.